WARNING… I get deep
It’s June and officially summer. To be honest, I’m having trouble thinking of all that I want to share with you this month. After my last newsletter, which fell on Mother’s Day, I feel different. Because I wrote down exactly how I felt, I think I was able to let a bit of the pain and anger go. Your support has been a huge help. More than I can ever express. Life will never be the same without my mom, but I’m ready to move one. Not that I wasn’t living or going about my life, because I was. But, now I’m ready to get my health and mind back on track. It’s what my mom would have wanted.
Getting Back On Track
This month I started my 21 day detox by Marlyn Diaz and joined The Bar Method summer challenge. Despite getting sick for a full week, I managed to stay on track healthwise.
Stay tune for more on my detox journey. I had previously done the detox in 2011 and loved how I felt as well as learned a lot about food and wellness. This is not one of those diets or detoxes where you feel hungry. I’m not about that life.
My job can be stressful. I take things personally when I shouldn’t. My schedule is crazy. There’s always a list of tasks to do and I put a lot of pressure on myself. The past few years I allowed all the stress to be an excuse to find comfort in food. When my mom got sick, food and work was my escape. My physical health took a decline. When you spend most of your day sitting to film and edit, you have to make an active effort to exercise. I did not. Climbing up three flights of stairs became hard. Walking down the street in warm weather found me out of breath. At 33 years old, this is not a good sign.
Growing up I had always been active. Dance classes, sports, and love for physical activities kept me in shape. It wasn’t until recently that I realized how much of my physical health was affecting my mental. It’s no secret I deal with depression. With depression, anxiety, and mood swings come as accessories. Yay me! (sarcasm). Yes, I want to look good in my clothes and feel good in photos, but honestly, I just want to be healthy.
So step one, we moved. Living in a pedestrian friendly neighborhood helps. Working from home can get stifling. However taking coffee and lunch breaks to walk to my local cafes has helped me physically and emotionally. I even found my favorite coffee spot 86 Cafe, where Royce greets me and makes my afternoon coffee with perfection. Iced vanilla latte with almond milk, add boba. Of course the last three weeks I’ve cut out my afternoon coffees for my detox, but I’ll be back Royce! I’ll be back.
Step two, find a workout that you love and a community to support you. I love dance based exercise. Part of the appeal of our new neighborhood is that it’s walking distance to The Bar Method. If my classes are not easy to get to, I won’t go. Parking a nightmare, I won’t go. Mean people, I won’t go. See a pattern? The Bar Method has friendly instructors, is a great workout, and the people are all super friendly.
Step three, schedule workouts. The last few weeks, I have had to miss events to make it to my classes. Before I would drop everything to be there for a meeting or an event, work came first, but now I put myself first when possible. At the end of each week, I schedule my workouts for the next. My goal is 3 to 4 workouts per week. Currently I am participating in the summer challenge, 15 classes in 30 days therefor I’ve had to up the workouts especially since I was sick for a week.
My mental health is an ongoing battle. I have noticed with the physical health improvements, my moods are more balanced. I’m able to let things go quicker. However with my detox internally, I’ve also started to detox my life externally.
There is a tendency to hoard in my family and in my profession. My job requires me to review products and stay on top of trends. Working hard, I’ve managed to make it onto PR lists to be able to do my job better, but there is a lot of excess in what I do. I feel like I have to keep up with every new launch. Viewer requested a review? Run out and buy it, even though I have a pile of products to test out. There is also the fear of needing a product for reference? It’s limited edition! Too pretty to use! I know it’s old, but it’s got memories. I need it. Maybe I’ll use it soon. All things that go through my head when thinking about decluttering.
I’ve started to do annual makeup donation parties where I invite my friends and family to shop gently used products for a cash donation that will be donated to a shelter. Doubles and products I know I can’t possibly get to get put aside for you guys as giveaways. Of course I also pass on anything to friends and family throughout the year that might need it when I’m done reviewing.
Going through my makeup collection, I notice all the forgotten products. I’ve learned to let it go. There will always be a new makeup launch, I’ll never really run out of foundation. If I actually ran out of something, I can walk to Sephora and pick it up. It’s okay. Move on. Stop the hoarding! You’ll be okay.
You know what? I feel better. Compared to most beauty bloggers out there, I think I’ve managed to narrow down my collection to a reasonable size. Now, I still have way more than any normal person should or need, but I’m in a much more manageable place. There is something about having clear space that helps me have a clear head. I feel lighter, freer, and happier. The best part is people who need the products have them and can truly appreciate it and I can appricate what I have.
Why So Much Hate?
This has really been heavy on my mind as I sit down to write.
Is it just me or is there a lot of hate going around?
Sometimes I think I live in a bubble. I’m surrounded by loving, open minded, educated people from all economic backgrounds and ethnicities. Just two weeks ago, I was so grateful to be apart of the mixedremixed.org festival discussing mix race and interracial marriage. It’s mind blowing that until 1967 interracial marriage was illegal in the U.S. My brother was born the year after it became legal! That means it wasn’t very long ago that I would not be allowed to marry Chris. WTF?! When you sit down and look at the timeline, we are not so far removed from the laws of segregation. My heart sinks when I think about this.
Naive Bubble Burst
Because of the internet, I thought future generations would have the opportunity to learn acceptance and love and be exposed to more of the world. But as much as the internet has opened up our worlds, it has allowed those who spew hatred and ignorance to have a platform and become successful.
This past week I saw how prevalent racism is. More importantly and most upsetting how racism is swept under the rug. We make excuses for people who say hurtful things and accept half assed apologies, that continue to make the same mistakes. Is it considered a mistake if it’s their continued behavior? My mom did this. Excuse the inexcusable because it was better to be sweet and not cause any waves. We praise those who speak their minds without care to the message they are sending because they are entertaining/fun. Our society rewards those who cause controversy.
Disgustingly those who are hurt and disappointed and are brave enough to voice their feelings in a respectable manner were called “haters”. How can we learn from each other if we do not take the time to listen and reflect? This is not to excuse the hateful comments that perpetuate the cycle of hate. But those who wanted to voice their hurt and share their experience to try and shed light on an important issue, should not be disregarded or attacked BY ANYONE.
Is It Getting Worse?
Growing up I did not deal much with racism. Looking back it occurred occasionally, but as a child I didn’t recognize it for what it was. Those times are uncomfortable and I wished someone had talked to me about it. How to handle it. That it’s okay to be upset and I should not feel bad for being “different.” Children are not born to hate, it is taught. As I watch my friends’ kids and my own nephew grow I know this to be a fact.
was my first real taste of racism. The theatre department would preach about blind casting and how wonderful it is to be ethnic. Everyone wants a color blind cast these days, were just some of the things said to me in college. This in itself is a form of racism, especially coming from an all white mostly male faculty. By the way, they cast a caucasian in the ONLY Asian role during my 3 years at the school vs. giving it to one of the 5 Asian female students… Their argument? She was the best for the role. Oh really… She was the best to play a Vietnam refugee with an accent? How about the actress whose parents escaped Vietnam and speaks Tagalog?
Let’s not forget this is not a Broadway production or a summer blockbuster film. This is a college production of a crap play meant to help educate and prepare the students who pay for their classes to become functional and contributing members of society looking to pursue a career in theatre . What were you teaching here exactly?
a pretty racist free time in my life and most of my time in LA has been as well. However, last year I encountered my first racial attack at an event. I was shocked and couldn’t believe the incident. Hubs who was not there, tried to be comforting, when I got home. I love him and I know he’s dealt with his own set of stereotyping, however at the the end of the day, he’s a straight white man. The most open minded, loving, peaceful, and smart man, but he doesn’t truly know what it’s like.
As the year progresses, I’m noticing more and more ignorance and blatant racism. Conditioned by my mom, part of me wants to stay silent on the subject, I talk about beauty, you probably only want to read about beauty, but what good is beauty if you’re hateful and ignorant?
“You can buy all the make up that M.A.C. can make
But if you can’t look inside you
Find out who am I too
Be in the position to make me feel so
Read more: TLC – Unpretty Lyrics | MetroLyrics
I’m not sure what the solution is, but I do know it’s not silence. It’s not hate or violence. So, I’m starting the discussion here. Leave me your thoughts in the comments. Please do keep it respectful. Discuss, debate, share, but understand everyone is entitled to their own feelings.
SUBSCRIBER GIVEAWAY WINNER: JUNE
Okay, so let’s lighten the post here. Each month I randomly select a newsletter subscriber as a winner. I’ve e-mailed June’s winner and she has received a little surprise in the mail from me.
Congratulations to Rachel W. !
Stay tuned, I’ll be doing exclusive giveaway opportunities here in addition to monthly winners
DON’T FORGET TO FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM @SEREINWU for more giveaways!
There’s also a Koh Gen Do Giveaway currently on my Facebook now thru June.
So I finished A Court of Wings and Ruin by Sarah J. Maas and OH MY GOD! I can’t even! Seriously if you like to read or just like stories, give this series a try! I’m happy with the whole series and how it concluded, but I defiently fell into a post book depression. Do you guys get those? I get them after a good book every time.
Next up, I just started King’s Cage by Victoria Aveyard the third book of the Red Queen series. It picks up exactly where we left off from book two and I’m on pins and needles to see where the story goes. So far so good, but only on chapter 4.
I’m asked how I find the time to read with the schedule I keep. Truth is I don’t read very often anymore. Listing to audiobooks is how I manage to fit in “reading.” It’s sad because I use to read for hours. Probably better for my eyes that I don’t stay up till 6am finishing a book, but I still miss it. If I could just lock myself away in a cabin and read all my favorite books for a week, I’d be a happy woman.
If you’d like to try audible, here’s a free book. You’ll have to create an account and use a credit card, but you can cancel right after your first book (which is free) and keep the book. I personally love audible and pay for a membership myself as well as hubs. Oh another great thing is if you don’t like the book you can return it! No questions asked. I’ve done that a few times myself.
MISSED PAST NEWSLETTERS?
May’s Newsletter (password: Mothers Day)
April’s Newsletter (now public)
March Newsletter (now public)
January Newsletter (now public)